This is a highly-accessible book that draws on Dr. Jim Osterhaus’ treasure store of counselling over many decades. It’s remarkable how Dr. Osterhaus has an uncanny radar for marital relationships. You may begin reading this book as any other, but find you pause frequently when a single line or vignette jumps off the page into your soul. Specifically, the book helps clearly connect family of origin dynamics with patterns that linger into the next generation. It’s also a helpful book to understand some of the underlying dynamics in your friends’ marriages, and helps engender a deeper empathy for them.
The “What is ‘healthy’?” question is just one of many questions couples have asked me over and over again in my counseling practice. The typical couples I’ve counseled have again and again asked, “Why do we get into so much conflict over the same issues?” “How can we learn to trust each other?” “Who leads?” “What do we do with in-laws?” and a whole host of other questions. In this book I take the 18 questions I’ve been asked the most and summarize my answers to them. Each chapter stands on its own as couples search for answers to the challenges they face. After many of the chapters, I’ve included helpful, practical tips to help you understand your relationship better, and begin the process of making it more fulfilling.
Jim Osterhaus is a clinical psychologist and public speaker based in Virginia, with extensive experience in helping individuals, couples, families, and organizations move through conflict and change. His experience includes a special commission established by the Vice President of the United States to consider the emotional effects of government downsizing, facilitation of the Organizational Culture component of the Army Staff Redesign.